Chief’s Travis Kelce Attacked. Subject Allegedly Yelled “This Is Sherwin-Williams Country!”
Kansas City, KS – As rumors of Kansas City Chief’s tight-end Travis Kelce and pop star Taylor Swift being an exclusive item swirl, The...
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THE MACHINATION TIMES
"The finest conspiracy news, idle chatter and utter nonsense on the internet"
The Machination Times
- Jun 22
- 2 min
Subway Foods Files Lawsuit Against Oceangate Submersible Company
Milford, CT - The famous fast food establishment known as Subway has filed a lawsuit against Oceangate, the now infamous submersible...
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The Machination Times
- Apr 11
- 2 min
Whole Foods Store Closes from Not Enough Homeless Taking Over
San Francisco, CA - A 65,000- square foot Whole Foods Market in downtown San Francisco is closing its doors, at least temporarily due to...
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The Machination Times
- Feb 22
- 1 min
Hunter Biden Amasses Hookers In Kiev, Ukraine For Soldiers
Kiev, Ukraine - Hunter Biden has rounded up all his favorite ladies of the night to give some relief and relaxation to Ukrainian...
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The Machination Times
- Jan 6
- 2 min
Kevin McCarthy Concedes to Not Give Funds to Prepping Coalitions
Washington, DC - The House of Representatives has been in turmoil since Tuesday, voting for a new Speaker of the House. Republican...
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The Machination Times
- Jan 3
- 2 min
Newest Twitter Files Reveal Liver King Is a Vegan
Austin, TX - Social media influencer and health fanatic Brian Johnson, more famously known as Liver King, was recently outed as a steroid...
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The Machination Times
- Dec 31, 2022
- 2 min
Andrew Tate Arrested. Assaults Pizza Boxes After Spat with Greta Thunberg
Romania - Former champion kickboxer and social media influencer Andrew Tate was recently arrested by Romanian law enforcement after an...
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The Machination Times
- Dec 23, 2022
- 2 min
Comedy Club Opened to Cause Misery
Iowa City, IA - In an explosive revelation, The Machination Times has revealed a comedy club was created to cause sadness and gloom. In...
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The Machination Times
- Nov 6, 2022
- 2 min
Elon Musk and AOC Rendezvous at Area 51
The recent takeover of social media site Twitter by Tesla founder and entrepreneur Elon Musk has not come without its drama. However,...
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The Machination Times
- Nov 4, 2022
- 2 min
Twitter Layoffs Are About More Than We Knew
Elon is doing what?
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