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Bud Light Snubs Flava Flav After Attempting to Form Partnership

Bud Light beer has rejected famed 90’s musician music artist Flava Flav after the old-school rapper attempted to form a deal for a spokesmanship.


In an exclusive interview, Flava Flav agreed to speak with The Machination Times.


“YEEEAAAHHHHAAAA, this is whack. We need the 90’s back, especially with music. All this gangbanging rapping is ruining everything. When I was coming up the gang banging wasn’t so bad; It was a low-key thing. Now, it is extreme. It ain’t your grandaddy’s gangsters anymore. All these tunes are about drugs and hoes nowadays. I thought since Bud Light is a huge, international brand, we could strike up a deal since I'm kind of a big deal. They are acting like the clock on my chest wouldn’t be accepted anymore. It was hip in the 90s and the fans would love it today.”




We reached out to the Bud Light marketing department, and we were able to speak to the Vice President of Marketing, Alissa Heinerscheid.



“So, I am completely insulted that Flava Flav thinks he, I hope that is his preferred pronoun, thinks he can just onboard here as a spokesman. The special chosen must have certain qualifications. Yes, he is flamboyant and loud and a huge character, some would even say fake. Those do meet all they we require, but the problem is he doesn’t have his pronouns in his Twitter bio; that is a huge disqualifier.”


Fans of 90’s rap and antique clocks have launched a massive boycott against Bud Light, the newest of controversies for the embattled beer brand since the hiring of controversial social media influencer Dylan Mulvaney as a spokesperson.


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