Washington, DC - In another conspiratorial move made by the United States government, there was an alleged “accounting error” that the Pentagon recently announced.
During a press conference to portray accountability, Pentagon spokesperson, Alejandra Castro, said that this money, $6.2 billion, will be used to support the Ukraine-Russia conflict. However, The Machination Times has found the money will be used for something else.
Yesterday, President Joe Biden’s son, Hunter Biden pled to two counts of tax evasion and a firearm charge; he will receive no jail time, probation only.
We didn’t believe that the monies would be used as we were told due to the timing of the Hunter Biden news, so we reached out to our Pentagon insider for the truth, the absolute truth.
“That money isn’t going to be used for the Ukraine-Russia fighting. That’s nonsense. It’s going to be used to pay off the taxes Hunter owes. Doesn’t make sense does it? It’s like taking money from your front pocket to put it in the back pocket. This is the government though. You should see what people leave on their desks - caricatures of politicians, underwear, half eaten Twinkies, and ‘How to Pentagon for Dummies’ books.”
Surprisingly, Hunter Biden agreed to give a statement on these allegations.
“Yeah my dad’s Pentagon is going to help me out! That’s the best part of being his son. I’ve never had to pay for a thing - crack, hookers, laptops, cellphones, trips, or cigarettes. And now, I still don’t have to pay for the taxes I didn’t pay and in a way Dad is paying for those too!”
When President Biden was asked about these claims, he replied with “You know I love my son and my ice cream, man!”