Yeti Seen Leaving The Krelim

As days pass by, many are wondering if a war between Russia and Ukraine is imminent as over 130,000 Russian troops amass on the border. However, sources say an unlikely diplomat might be making inroads between the leaders of the two countries.

A source close to the Russian government says that while Yeti's are usually difficult to locate, they are reportedly pretty good negotiators. The Machination Times was told that the Yeti gained top government clearance in order to meet with the Russian president, Vladimir Putin.

“Yeah, we all thought this was a joke. We didn’t believe that a Yeti was in the Krelim advising President Putin. Who is going to tell a former KGB operative what to do? I guess the short answer is a Yeti; something we never thought was possible, but it is 2022 after all.”

Some may question how a Yeti can get clearance for top government military discussions. An insider in the Yeti community believes that it may be due to the ability for their residents to keep a secret, such as their location, hunting habits and the ability to nimbly move from area to area without detection.

Another source spoke under the agreeance of anonymity. They stated that the Yeti was able to create a bond with President Putin while sipping on Stolichnaya Vodka and talking about the ability to tame wild horses, then riding the stallions while shirtless through the plains of Russkaya Ravnina.

We learned that while the Yeti seemed to create a synergism with Putin, he is still insisting in sword rattling at a minimum, leaving uncertainty on the table.